Friday, November 25, 2005

Letter to My Tih-Kong---sense meme no. 1- Feel/Touch

(short post to Barney and Li-er's meme on the 5 senses to me...read and you shall know I'm ranting and talking much about nothing....still very busy now, will be more diligent in the near future...haiz...drowning drowning!!)



Hi all!


If I keep this up, I shall lose my coverted title of Madam Long-Windedness soon. Meaning this is again another short post. Meaning that I'm still in the Red and struggling to earn enuff money to spend them all. Meaning that i'm underpaid but am truly appreciated as a highly efficient employee (Hah!). Meaning also that I'm doing Sai-Kang (Chuikueh don't learn!) for not just Prof XXX and YYY, but also from AAA to ZZZ.


In short, meaning I'm working my orange-peel ass off down here trying to cover a lot other pinched, wrinkly, taut (haha...don't think so), pink, scarred, cellulite, smooth, moisturized etc asses.


Ahem...not that I've SEEN their asses...but they have asses nevertheless.


But since my own jobscope actually contains the Mountain and Sea Coverage Clause -no. 1296- employee to pao suah, pao hai when duty calls, notwithstanding hail, sleet, fire, nuclear war, terrorism or any other known forms of natural disasters - So I cannot comprain bitterly....


I can only comprain.


Anyways, i digress....


(Hmmm....i guess I won't be losing my title after all....)


Let's talk about the weather.


Yup, that small-talk topic. I not only wanna talk about it, I wanna comprain about it! In fact, I wanna blast my dissatisfaction all the way up to my Tih-Kong. In case u guys don't know, although I'm Buddhist to my Kuan-Yin, I'm also half-taoist. I've got a lot of dieties passed down from my late great-granny, who actually doesn't eat beef and is vegetarian on some days.



***********

Another aside: (Haiz! I tot it would be a short entry!)--I think you can tell from here that i generally have a pretty heck-care attitude to observing the proprieties of my religion/teachings but before anyone comprains hor---


Yes i eat Beef! I Love Beef! and I also eat Veggies! I Love Broccoli!



But I never, will never ever! substitute my Broccoli for my Beef and pretend my Broccoli is Beef!



And in fact, if i ever eat mock meat to substitute real Red Blood Cells and Muscle tissues, it's because that vegetarian stall had the shortest Q.



I also consider that once ppl have discovered the secret to make tofu taste like real steak, Doomsday is ard the corner! U hear?! Got comprain?! Lai ah! I fight!





************


Back to the weather report....


Address- The West Sky, 20,000 feet and beyond.

Dear Tih-Kong,

Hi and How are you, Sir?


Everyday I wake up at 6.30am...to shut off my alarm becos the sky is still dark....then go back to sleep. Then I wake up again at 7.30am to pulverise the said clock because it's still too dark to find my glasses and the hammer was closer. By 8am, I woke up because of guilt that I scratched my hammerhead, and found out that i'm already very late for work...


but Sir, why is the sky still so Orh-Lu-Lu?! I had forsaken my clock to be awaken by the glory of sunshine flooding my bedroom. I position my bed to face the window so that Tai-yang-sen can come toast my feet by 7am to really Really wake me up. But now, everytime i open my eyes, it's all so dark and rainy and grey!


My poor cracked toes shiver in the cold....


Now everytime I go to work, I feel as grey and black as the sky, it's all so depressing. Somemore I got slight night-blindness, so I've been banging pillars again, Tih-Kong, and it hurts.


Pls Tih-Kong, ask Tai-yang-sen to come grill my willies again leh. Bring him to task for not doing his job properly. I really need the sun. My skin now so pale, and I'm under-nourished in the Vitamin D department. even smiling now also zaps my energy...I know i got high fat content, Sir, but I really rather sweat.


It's making my colleagues snort to see me jiggle shiver. They use to give me a 10m radius for the smell but now they think I'm hiding a U-Zap under my blouse and have been making snide remarks to me at a distance of 3m....


They are getting too close for comfort....


Really very sorry to bother you with such a trivial matter, but really leh, so heng December got Christmas hor, but all the Lights in Orchard shall not be warmer or hotter than Tai-Yang-Sen's gaze on me...


Thank you for your time and patience. I shall look forward to waking up with tanned feet again.

Yours shiveringly,

AKK.



What crap i write....oh well, till next time!

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

I know what song u can sing next... Jingle Bell!!! Christmas coming! =)

barneysaurus said...

I think my fault, I have actually been praying for lousy weather due to *ahem* some reasons, keke....

Anyway, I also sibeh sian. Sucks to have to wake up at 6.30am lor.

Anonymous said...

I remembered last time you told me got this foreign worker climbed to your window grill and peeped into your room.

Maybe that was the Tai Yang Sen but you drove him away. Hence the gloomy mornings. :P

kim said...

Think the weather is due to me constantly doing the Rain Dance to pray for rain. :D :D :D

Wallace said...

Eh don't comprain la.

Gloomy? Cold? In Singapore? *disbelieving look*

I don't even see daylight, let alone the sun......

Ang Ku Kueh said...

cae:

eh...u really do come for the songs hor...i actually dunno any lyrics to x'mas songs...

barney:

u jidan!!! wat have u done to my tai-yang-sen!!!


jay:


jidan to u also, bring this up! Sorry, i not being racist here....but he's not 'bright' enough to be my tai-yang-sen....


stars:

arghh!!! U also another jidan! hahahaha....all u conspired to freeze my toes blue!

wally:

I'm sure if I'm abroad in UK, I'd write an even worse letter of comprain to Tih-Kong. as such, this letter is quite nice...


vanna:

oh yeah! only for a while, hahaha....still working my head off...but at least can catch a breath and say hi to u! :) I know lah, very short, which is why I post so slowly...haiz...

ivanny said...

hey! LOL... sorry ar... i was one of the 49 in my platoon whom was praying for rain everyday the last week! lol... my fault my fault! lol...

atelierz said...

Yup... the weather for the past one week has been kinda cool, freaking cool! You take care ok, since you are so busy with work. Rem to drink lots of water so you won't fall sick. And no worries abt the meme thingy... i'm not rushing you, am I? =P

Anonymous said...

Haha! I come to read about the chronicles of A too. Very sweet and nice guy, I must say. Can learn alot from him =)

Ang Ku Kueh said...

ivanny:

pls read earlier comments..u all are Jidans!!! heheeheh....

li-er:

nooo....just a wake-up call for me to remember not top neglect my blog....work is work, but it's not my LIfe....altho it's trying hard to be...haiz...

cae:

heheheh...he's OK lah....I'm a bit worried abt the corniness, heheheeh....


syee:

oh!!! why they call u akkueh ah? U got apple cheeks??? :)

Tempest Blue said...

you call this a short post? :-p

Its my fault, I've been doing ritual sacrifices and raindances to transfer all the sunday rain to the weekdays!

"Pls Tih-Kong, ask Tai-yang-sen to come grill my willies"

Er.. Waaaat??

Zhe Bin said...

Haha! Eh seriously I want the sun too. You know what, the sun was on off on off today when I attempted suntanning at my friend's condo. I was afraid I will zhao liang instead lor. And I'm desperate for sun because I am as white as this space I'm typing into.

How come that foreign worker can 'climb' until your window grille one?!

Anonymous said...

wahahahaha. hey, I thought girls dun smell one? how come u smell????

heeheee

frenie

Ang Ku Kueh said...

tempest:

hehehe.....my toes are my willies....i guess u can tell how i name my ***.....

syee:

the er...'squishyness' i can relate to...heheeh

zhebin:

hmm...about the worker...pehaps another post, heheh....

frenie:

ay!!!! so good to see u here, gal!!! about the smell, I can't help it....haiz....

nadnut said...

bad weather? lets go out for dinner one day! that will cheer us up! and we can discuss on the plans to *cough* terminate j's nuts!

nadnut said...

tofu as steak?

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ang Ku Kueh said...

nad:

hahaha...i know a 'isn't it time to UPDATE your BLOG?!' comment when i see one.....